"I'm too old for this" and other things said in the library

"Jesus Christ..." I huffed at a group of giggly second year students who were trying to negotiate the revolving door to Boots Library whilst holding what looked like ten coffees. They screeched as one got her bag stuck, then one proceeded to get her phone out to Snapchat the entire event. If you can't tell, it's exam season, my face constantly looks like Grumpy Cat and as was the case at school - if I am older than you I am therefore far superior and you should stay FAR away from me and the row of computers final years are gunning for on the top floor. It's no secret to any Trent student that Boots library is simply not big enough. Sure, it's technically six floors, but trying to find anywhere to sit let alone use a computer is like trying to sit on the Iron Throne, near impossible without murdering someone.
You might sit there, rolling your eyes at this blog post, another in a long line of cynical, grouchy posts I've made, hissing about something or other, but for once, I am totally right. Not that my post about going to the gym was rubbish, but I'm a fourth year and actually, the work I do is more important than the Wikipedia researched last minute essays some first years submit to their tutors seven minutes before the deadline. Maybe it's jealousy that I'm being so mean, I haven't been on a night out in months and the phrase "lie-in" makes me feel like the old woman on Titanic - it's been eighty four years.
Don't worry freshers, it's not just you! In fact to put your minds at rest, since I know how truly STRESSFUL your studies are and all that PRESSURE you're under, I've made a list of the more ridiculous things I've seen in the library.

• A selfie stick
• A homeless man sleeping
• Six girls gathered around one computer
• Someone watching The Voice
• Someone Skyping without headphones
• A lecturer on Tumblr
• Fanfic
• Bags on computers not in use

Maybe it's just me, maybe I have poor timing and go to the fourth floor bright eyed and bushy tailed only to be devastated at what I find just cause I've picked the exact wrong minute. I know it's not all first years that do this. Some of them do what I want them to do and stay hungover in bed watching Extreme Makeover until 3:30pm in their underpants. Thanks guys. Maybe I'm just overreacting. But I'm so, totally not. So on behalf of every final year university student the length and breadth of our deceivingly sunny nation, (it's actually colder than it looks kids!) Freshers, please, would you ever so kindly go away and wait for us to all leave. I guarantee you'll feel the same in two or three years. And if not, you're doing final year wrong. Get back to the library and don't leave until you're crying.

I sound like Victor Meldrew. But I really do believe it.